If you’re reading this, you’ve probably been worried about your teen for a while. Maybe they’ve seemed more withdrawn, anxious, or irritable. Maybe they asked for help themselves. Either way, deciding to start therapy is a big step, and it’s normal to have questions about what happens behind that office door.
Here’s what I tell parents who are just getting started.
How the first sessions usually go
The first session is mostly about getting to know each other. I’ll talk with you and your teen about what brought you in and what you’re hoping for, then spend time with your teen alone to hear their perspective. There’s no pressure to share everything right away, and no “right” way to start.
Many teens are quiet at first. Some say very little for the first few sessions, and that’s okay. Trust takes time, and a teen who feels rushed usually shuts down. My job is to make the space feel low-pressure enough that opening up becomes possible.
For teens who find sitting across from someone intense, I also offer Walk and Talk sessions and somatic therapy in Ferndale. Moving side by side, without constant eye contact, can make conversations feel easier for some people.
The confidentiality question
This is the one parents ask about most, and it’s the one that matters a lot to teens. Therapy works best when your teen believes it’s a space that’s truly theirs.
In general, here’s how it works:
What your teen shares stays between us. I won’t report back on the details of their conversations, their friendships, or their private thoughts.
There are safety exceptions. If I believe your teen is at risk of serious harm to themselves or someone else, or if there’s concern about abuse, I’m required to take action, and I’ll involve you.
I’ll explain this to your teen, too. At the start, I go over confidentiality with them so that nothing is a surprise.
Parents aren't left in the dark, though. Every four sessions, I’ll invite you into the session and use the first 15 minutes or so to check in with you and your teen together. We'll talk about general progress, goals, and how things are going at home, without going into the details of what's said in session.
I know it can be hard to hear that you won’t get a play-by-play. But in my experience, teens open up more when they know the room is safe, and that usually benefits the whole family.
What your role looks like
You’re not on the sidelines. Parents are an important part of the process, just in a different way than your teen is. Here’s what helps most:
Be patient with the timeline. Change isn’t always visible right away, and it doesn’t happen in a straight line.
Resist the urge to ask, “What did you talk about?” Try “How are you feeling after that?” or just offer a snack and some quiet.
Stay open with me. If you notice something at home, tell me. I can’t share session details, but I can always take in what you tell me.
Keep showing up. Getting to appointments, being supportive, and keeping home steady matter more than you might think.
What therapy isn’t
Therapy isn’t a place where a teen gets “fixed,” lectured, or sent back with a list of things to do. It’s a place to be heard, build self-understanding, and learn tools for handling big feelings, such as anxiety, low mood, stress, and the pressure of growing up. I work with integrative tools, and sometimes that includes mindfulness, breathwork, or gentle movement, if your teen is open to it.
How to talk to your teen before the first session
If your teen is hesitant, try saying something like: “I’m not sending you to be fixed. I just want you to have someone in your corner who isn’t me.” Then let them ask questions, and be honest if you don’t know the answer.
Ready to take the next step?
I work with teens (15+) and adults in Ferndale, Michigan and virtually across Michigan. I have afternoon and evening availability, which can make it easier to fit sessions around school, sports, and work.
Book a first session or email me with questions. I’m happy to talk through whether therapy feels like the right fit for your family.